1) GOVT. : What are you doing?
INDIAN : Business.
Tax : PAY PROFESSIONAL TAX!
2) GOVT. : What are you doing in Business?
INDIAN : Selling the Goods.
Tax : PAY SALES TAX!!
3) GOVT. : From where are you getting Goods?
INDIAN : From other State/Abroad
Tax : PAY CENTRAL SALES TAX, CUSTOM DUTY & OCTROI!
4) GOVT. : What are you getting in Selling Goods?
INDIAN : Profit.
Tax : PAY INCOME TAX!
5) GOVT. : How do you distribute profit ?
INDIAN : By way of dividend
Tax : Pay dividend distribution Tax
6) GOVT. : Where you Manufacturing the Goods?
INDIAN : Factory.
Tax : PAY EXCISE DUTY!
7) GOVT. : Do you have Office / Warehouse/ Factory?
INDIAN : Yes
Tax : PAY MUNICIPAL & FIRE TAX!
8) GOVT. : Do you have Staff?
INDIAN : Yes
Tax : PAY STAFF PROFESSIONAL TAX!
9) GOVT. : Doing business in Millions?
INDIAN : Yes
Tax : PAY TURNOVER TAX!
INDIAN : No
Tax : Then pay Minimum Alternate Tax
10) GOVT. : Are you taking out over 25,000 Cash from Bank?
INDIAN : Yes, for Salary.
Tax : PAY CASH HANDLING TAX!
11) GOVT.: Where are you taking your client for Lunch & Dinner?
INDIAN : Hotel
Tax : PAY FOOD & ENTERTAINMENT TAX!
12) GOVT.: Are you going Out of Station for Business?
INDIAN : Yes
Tax : PAY FRINGE BENEFIT TAX!
13) GOVT.: Have you taken or given any Service/s?
INDIAN : Yes
Tax : PAY SERVICE TAX!
14) GOVT.: How come you got such a Big Amount?
INDIAN : Gift on birthday.
Tax : PAY GIFT TAX!
15) GOVT.: Do you have any Wealth?
INDIAN : Yes
Tax : PAY WEALTH TAX!
16) GOVT..: To reduce Tension, for entertainment, where are you going?
INDIAN : Cinema or Resort.
Tax : PAY ENTERTAINMENT TAX!
17) GOVT.: Have you purchased House?
INDIAN : Yes
Tax : PAY STAMP DUTY & REGISTRATION FEE !
18) GOVT.: How you Travel?
INDIAN : Bus
Tax : PAY SURCHARGE!
19) GOVT.: Any Additional Tax?
INDIAN : Yes
Tax : PAY EDUCATIONAL, ADDITIONAL EDUCATIONAL & SURCHARGE ON ALL THE
CENTRAL GOVT.'s TAX !!!
20) GOVT.: Delayed any time Paying Any Tax?
INDIAN : Yes
Tax : PAY INTEREST & PENALTY!
21) INDIAN : can i die now??
GOVT : Wait! we are about to launch the FUNERAL TAX!!!
YOU WANT TO READ JOKES(VEG & NON-VEG)? YOU WANT SOME STORIES, YOU WANT SOME OPINIONS ABOUT YOUR LIFESTYLE? YOU LOVE TO SHARE YOUR EXPERIENCES? YOU WANT TO EXPRESS YOUR FEELINGS? THAN, YOU CAN STOP YOURSELF HERE AND START HAVING FUN...
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Thursday, February 12, 2009
LESSONS TO BE LEARNT FROM MARWADIS
God & Marwadi...!!
A Marwadi having no child, no money, no home, and have a blind mother, prays to God.
God being happy with his prays, grants him only ONE wish!
Marwadi : I want my mother to see my wife putting Diamond bangles on my Child's hands in our new home!
God : Damn !!! I still have a lot to learn from these Marwadi's
Lessons learnt from the above story:-Compile all requirements and present in one line rather boring appraiser for long time.